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Thursday, July 22, 2010

Well it's time to start...I've been procrastinating.

My weight has been a yo yo for most of my life. As a teenager, I had a very nice figure, but of course thought I was fat. My measurements were 36-27-38. I could wear a vintage 12, most of the time. My big weight troubles began when I had my first child. Seems pregnancy has been a huge contributing factor to my weight problem.

I went from 135 pounds at 5'8" to 180 pounds after I gave birth. I worked hard and got down to about 155, but would never again be 135. My weight gradually climbed up to my post pregnancy weight and by the time my daughter was 2 and a half, I was over 200 pounds. This was in my early 20s. In 1989 I went to work at a pre school and all the running around helped me lose about 30-35 pounds. I didn't have a scale so I have no idea how much I lost. I just know I could wear a size 14.

When I went back to work at an office, the weight came back on. For me, activity and diet are THE ONLY reason I lose or gain weight. Working in an office I was eating more and sitting on my butt. I also was drinking a lot of beer then. I put the weight back on and then some.

Well, I decided, in 1992, after meeting my husband and getting sober, to start exercising and watching what I ate. I quickly lost about 45 pounds and got myself back down to about 170 pounds. Again, I didn't use a scale, so I am guessing by how many sizes I'd gone down. I went from about a size 22 to a 14.

When Frank and I moved in together, we started eating out a lot, I was working in an office, and of course the weight came back on once I gave up the exercise and proper eating. We got engaged and the eating continued. Then I managed to put on another 20 pounds after we were married. I was at that point 233 pounds. This I know because I went to my doctor to get "Redux" medication. The medication worked (this was in 1996) and I got down to about 180. I was looking better and stopped taking the medication. Within a few months, I was pregnant and of course, my weight was over 200 after her birth. I didn't lose any weight after she was born and after Mason's birth I was HUGE.

My friend recently sent this photo:


I know I weigh about 265 pounds in that photo because I went to Weight Watchers on 9/11/01...that's right, 9/11. I think the trauma of that day made me want to change my life for the better.

My first Weight Watchers meeting was great. I realized that I could follow this plan because it wasn't really a "diet." I lost 43 pounds within 6 months. I was breast feeding at the time and that helped.

I was still committed to losing weight when my oldest daughter who was 14 was diagnosed with Anorexia and Bulimia. I had noticed her weight dropping and her not eating. When she was below 115 I confronted her, and she tried to play it off that she was being careful and following my example, but there wasn't a problem. About a week later, her father phoned me and told me he caught her inducing vomiting. He hadn't talked to her about it so when I picked her up, I initiated the discussion and it was confirmed that she was doing it herself and she believed she had a problem.

One of the first things her therapist told me was I could no longer count points, write down what I ate, etc. where she might see it. I had to stop the Weight Watchers. This was in 2002.

In 2004 I broke my foot and was told I could not walk for 8 weeks. All I could do was lay on the couch. This picture was taken shortly after it healed:


I think it was pictures from the Hollywood Showdown in 2005 that made me go back to Weight Watchers. I looked so huge and the photos made me cringe. I knew WW worked from before, so I gave it another shot. I was over 250 pounds again, and within a year I lost over 60 and was about 190 in early 2007.

I had a bit of personal drama in 2007. My husband and I separated and after reconciliation, we did a lot of eating and comforting ourselves. I put back on 40 pounds, almost over night, it seemed.

Last summer I got tired of not being able to wear cute clothes. I went back to weight watchers and I'm happy to say I lost 50 pounds. I have been plateaued since I quit smoking in April. Part of the problem is I wasn't that committed to quitting. I continued to bum a smoke here and there. Last week I told myself I don't want to be weak and the urge to buy cigarettes was getting stronger with each cigarette I bummed. Also, the urge to eat junk when I didn't smoke was stronger and I was giving into temptation more and more. I don't want to go back to how I looked just last year, so I have started this blog as a therapeutic deterrent. Maybe others will be inspired. I hope so. Last year I know a few people, including my good friend Jessica was inspired by me and lost over 35 pounds. I must say she and I were rocking it at Viva this year.

I have not been to a weight watchers meeting in almost a month. I am going to go to one tonight. Wish me luck and lets hope this "plateau" hasn't been too damaging.

3 comments:

Miss Dollie DeVille said...

You go girl! I am right there with you. I have not missed a WW meeting since I started 8/1/09. I am 45 lbs lighter and getting my WW livetime membership. I am really happy you started this blog. I hope we can both work together to be the best we can be, and rock it at VLV next year! Whooooo hoooooo!

XOXO
Dollie

Straight Talking Mama! said...

Thanks for doing this, it helps to know others struggle, I haven't done anything about my weight lately yet I hate myself for it! I think I don't want to get into the yoyo dieting again, losing it all, gaining it all and more, losing it all, gaining it all and more, I know you know what I mean as you've clearly been through it.

Although it's time and things need to change so people writing about their experiences help me!

THE BIG MAMA INTROSPECTION said...

You are very courageous ! Go girl ! i support you by thoughts ;)